


Spaceman To Bowtied Boy

by holmes_wilson11



Category: British Actor RPF, David Tennant - Fandom, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005), Matt Smith - Fandom, Scottish Actor RPF
Genre: David Tennant - Freeform, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Feelings, Feels, IN SPACE!, Loss, Post Regeneration, Regeneration, Relationship(s), Telepathic Bond, Tenth Doctor Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-22
Updated: 2016-08-07
Packaged: 2018-07-16 14:36:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7272094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holmes_wilson11/pseuds/holmes_wilson11
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Your spaceman has regenerated, but into what exactly? A crazy person.</p>
          </blockquote>





	1. I'll Always Be Brave For You

I heard the familiar click of the tardis key unlocking that beautiful blue wooden door, I had never been so happy to hear that sound before in my life. 

The doctor was back. 

A few days back he’d said he was going to finish some bucket list or... something, that was in the form of a list, he had showed it to me, shoving it in my face with his signature bubbly grin. He had told me, well, ordered me to stay back in the tardis. 

~~~~~Flash back~~~~~

“Oooh you don’t wanna come with me, do you? It’ll be dreadfully boring. Plus you’ve been exhausted lately, too much running if you ask me. Stay back, cuddle up in the library with a Harry Potter book or something.” 

My face scrunched up in confliction, I was certainly contemplating his offer. I was run off my feet, especially after getting gassed by the master in our last adventure, I was all hazy still. It just sounded so tempting, having a few days to just chill out and laze around. I couldn’t just leave him out there all alone though. We all know where the doctor goes, the monsters are and 99.9% of the time he gets himself in a pickle. 

He must’ve known my pattern of thoughts as a gentle smile washed over his face. Stepping forward slightly he placed his hands on my shoulders and looked down at me with sincere eyes. 

“I’ll be fine, I promise.” He nodded, his voice something just above a whisper.

I sighed deeply at the time lord in front of me 

“Alright.” I agreed, my voice barely auditable,

He grinned like a mad man, his face lighting up that way it always did. I couldn’t help but smile back at him, after all, he is the reason I smile. 

He roughly cupped my cheeks and pressed a soft kiss to my lips, one that seemed to linger and stew as we both stood in some proximity to one another, eyes still closed, the taste of him rushing through me, overcrowding my senses and taking me to a new kind of delirium. 

He went ahead and pressed his forehead to mine, a gave him silent permission to do so, our relationship was mostly build of silent trust and feelings, don’t get me wrong, it is nice hearing it aloud but to have him say it in my head, to have his feeling for me flood through my veins like I were feeling them meant so much more than measly words. 

_I love you_

His voice rung through my head,

_And I, love you, my spaceman._

My hands slid onto his cheeks bringing his lips back down onto mine. Giving me a few short and sweet couple of pecks. 

“Now, go have some fun.” I smiled, pointing to the door and raising my eyebrows 

“Oi, quick to get rid of me aye!” 

I shook my head at him, a small giggle escaping my lips. 

~~~~~End of flash back~~~~~

So when I heard that little squeak of the door opening from the corridor I was currently walking down, I started to run, run as fast as my feet would take me to him. 

“Doct-”I got cut off by the sight before me

The doctor crippled against the door, his face… the look of pain stained his otherwise beautiful features. He lifted his head off the door to glance at me. 

“Orr.” I finished in a whisper.

My feet now moving as if I didn’t even have to think about it, like it was a voluntary movement to be by his side. I helped his limp figure off the door and walked him over to the console, him wincing with each step we took. He braced himself on the console hissing in some deep breaths. 

“Do you wanna tell me what’s happening?” I asked, although I had a good idea, I didn’t wanna believe it, it was too devastating. 

He stayed silent for a few moments and I searched his eyes for something, anything other than that. He turned to finally look at me, his beautiful chocolate brown eyes glassed over with the reality of the situation and I knew. 

“Oh Y/N, My gorgeous Y/N, I think you know what’s happening to me.” 

I shook my head violently, I was not willing to believe it, not now. A whole bender of emotions had been chopped up in my head and released into my body, crashing through it like waves, would on a beach. I bit my lip harshly and my hand quickly covered my mouth, to stop myself from screaming or sobbing, I wasn’t sure which would come first. 

“Y-You... can’t.” I stuttered blindly, there was nothing I could do anymore, I couldn’t even touch him. 

All those times that he’d read to me about the time lords way of cheating death, all those stories he talked about, 900 years of time and space, the same man just a different face, he always said with a smile. He even showed me, his memories of the last regeneration the vivid imagines floating into my subconscious and shocking me. None of that even came close to preparing me for this moment. 

A loud thump resonated through the tardis, the doctor’s fist was jammed into the console, it indented to the shape of it. Here comes the fiery of a time lord,

“I could do so much more… So much more!!” He yelled angrily his chest huffing in rage,

“But this is what I get, my reward..” a single tear pooling down his well sculpted cheek,

“And, it’s not fair!!” He screamed flinging all different bits of the tardis onto her floor.

The tardis made a deep groan of sadness of her companions rage.

“I-I love you.” I whispered softly 

A broken smile patched up his face and soon enough he was right in front of me. His hand reached out and traced my cheek ever so softly but he pulled away, as the orange yellow light swirled out into the air from his skin. 

“You can’t touch... it’s not long now.” I hummed, trying to sound as reassuring as I could be at a time like this. 

“Y/N, I can’t promise you the next man I’m turning into will love you, but, I promise I’ll always be there for you, inside of him. And t-this face.. This face will always love you.” He nodded his bottom lip pouting ever so slightly and tears fell down both our cheeks. 

I sobbed, I couldn’t hold in the feeling of despair anymore. The doctor made his way around the tardis one last time, his eyes fluttered shut, he was preparing himself. 

“Spaceman?” I yelped 

He opened his eyes, looking toward me. Oh! was I gonna miss those beautiful, sorrowful eyes. 

“I’ll always be brave for you.” I weakly told him my voice cracking as I did so. 

He nodded, a weak smile on lips as his face lit up orange, the light almost blinding to me. 

I tried so hard to keep my eyes open but it was like he was protecting me still, from seeing him die. My eyes hailed shut and his voice rung through his ship that was bigger on the inside. 

“I don’t want to go.” 

But it was much too late.


	2. A Completely New Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your spaceman has regenerated, but into what exactly? A crazy person.

The tardis was getting completely destroyed by the doctor’s regeneration energy. There was fire and all different bits of mechanical wiring everywhere. I had crawled to the console and tucked myself away, using that little bit of space as a shelter. I peeked around the corner and there he was, a whole new man, it was almost unbelievable. He looked so completely different and my heart ached in my chest, ached with loss. I just wanted to be in my spaceman’s arms and have him tell me that all this, was just a dream, yet, the loss felt too real to be a dream. 

I tucked myself away again wiping the fresh tears from my cheeks and holding my legs to my chest tightly. Memories, ones that I didn’t want right now over flowed the barriers holding them back inside my head. Memories of him. I shuddered and set out a small sob burying my face into my knees. 

“Legs! I’ve got legs! Good.” A voice... his new voice cheered.

I was curious even in the pool of a mess I was on the floor, at his discovery of legs and moved once again to look his way.

“Arms, hands! Oooh fingers! Lots of fingers! Ears, yes. Eyes, two. Nose, I’ve had worse.” He shrugged, 

A confused look plastered on my face and my tears started to dry, I shook my head at the madman in front of me. 

“Chin, Blimey! Hair. I’m a girl!! No! No! I’m not a girl. No.” 

He took a piece of his fringe in his hands and pulled it in front of his face. 

_What on earth is he doing?_

“And still not ginger!!” He said in a cursing voice. 

I let out a small chuckle at the new boys shenanigans. Of course it wasn’t loud enough for him to hear it. 

“There’s something else. There’s something important. I’m… I’m… I’m.” He struggled 

“Ha! Crashing!” He yelped happily laughing it off like only a madman would.

The fire was still raging and the time machine swirled around in the air.

“Geronimo!” He roared, smiling. 

I hid again, ready for the bumpy ride ahead. I held onto the console with all the strength I had in me. I knew what a smooth ride was with the doctor and trust me my definition of smooth was much different from his. We were certainly crashing alright and my hands could only hold on for so much longer. The tardis powered on at top speed, sudden jolts here and there. 

Maybe I wouldn’t survive this… scary thought actually. I mean what if I lost my grip and fell or got hit with bits of debree? Would he come and save me? Maybe he wasn’t a good man now, maybe he was like the master, although, I do doubt it after his earlier charades. 

The tardis twisted and turned all over the place even more so, the man before me joyfully danced around her console pulling and pushing at this and that trying to calm his machine down. He must’ve only distressed her more as her doors flung open and a gushing wind hissed in. 

I tilted my head to look down, a million lights shone up from below. It was London, my home, I could recognize it even from this far up, you get used to looking down at things when you’re in the tardis. A small smile made its way to my lips, until I realised that we could potentially crash into it, you know London, a major city! 

Smoke from the fire inside flowed out with the wind causing giant grey clouds to form in the sky above us. The force of the gale got stronger and I shivered, my hair flew all over the place, blocking my view and I pushed it out of the way quickly. My eyes scanned around for the younger man, 

“AGH!” He yelped! 

My eyes widened at the call of distress, now I was panicking. I shakily hopped to my feet, my heart hammering in my chest as I took short breaths. 

“Doctor!?” I called out of habit, 

“Ag-gh!” He growled,

I twirled around in circles looking for any sign of the time lord, then I noticed two hands clinging on for dear life on the edge of the tardis. Trying their hardest to claw their way back to safety. I was scared to say the least, I was always scared when I had to be the hero.. When his life was in my hands. But, I was always brave for him and I wasn’t gonna stop now, not when he needed me.

I carefully maneuvered my way around the fire and debris to the edge of the ship. I took a deep shaky breath. 

Here goes nothing,

I took hold of the handle on the door of the tardis, trying to keep myself steady as best I could, I slowly knelt down. My knees hit the ground and I sighed in relief, I didn’t get thrown out, that was a good sign. 

I glanced down and just like that I saw him properly for the first time. A small wail made its way out of my throat and I could feel the tears swell in my eyes, once again. My emotions got pushed aside when I looked down at the city below up, jolts of adrenaline coursed through me in that moment. I took a hold of his hands and heaved him back up into the tardis. He helplessly collapsed on the ground and we pushed the doors closed together. 

We sat there, next to each other keeping the doors shut with our backs pressed to them firmly. There was an uncomfortable silence between us. His mouth opening every once in a while to say something, anything to break this hell, but it shut again. I had nothing to say to him, not yet anyways. The tardis shoved and hopped all over again and I exhaled shakily, I was too emotionally exhausted for this right now. 

“Go easy on him old girl.” I whispered softly, running my hand down the wall closest to me. 

The tardis let out a small whine, one that somewhat represented relief in my mind. She suddenly jolted up and started on a smooth course. 

He looked at me, his green eyes staring into my soul, wondering I suppose. The tardis and I had always had a good relationship, I was mostly, sometimes, as mad as the doctor and that did include me talking to his beautiful time machine. I turned to look at him again, properly, up close. I couldn’t.. I just couldn’t, my head felt like it going to explode if I looked at him any longer. I shut my eyes and tipped my head down once more. 

I felt his presence shift as he pressed into the wall to help with the difficult task of getting up. My eyes briefly opened again to see if he was okay, good old me, I still cared about him, even if I didn’t want him. I puffed out a large breath in exhaustion and let my shoulders droop, relieving the stress in my back. 

The doctor once again turned to me, offering me his hand. I hesitated looking at it intensely.. He really was different, every single atom in his body changed in a blink of an eye. I bit my lip harshly and took it, him helping me to my feet. Just because I was grieving him… my spaceman, doesn’t mean I couldn’t give the new boy in town a chance. I suppose that’s why I took his hand, to tell him that I wasn’t just gonna push him out.. That I just needed time to accept this. 

My eyes locked with his and he gave me a small smile, I think it was because I had finally formally acknowledged him. A felt a sense of insecurity in his eyes,

“C-can.” I started but my voice broke out. 

He raised an eyebrow as if to usher me to go on. 

“Can you.. J-just.. not wear.. that. H-His clothes?” I whispered struggling with each word 

He glanced down at himself, looking at the now ripped fabric of a suit. I shook my head and turned away, I couldn’t bear to see it like that. 

He nodded 

“Of course.” 

With that I walked off, back to my room.


End file.
